Hello Cedric,

It's been long since mommy last spoke to you. Mommy just suddenly thought of you today and decided to write you a letter.

I'm sorry Joshua lost your baby bear. Or rather, I'm sorry I lost your baby bear. We let Joshua bring it out and I didn't notice it was missing until we got home. By then it was way too late. We must have dropped at the mall or something. I'm really really sorry. But Mommy's going to go back to IKEA to buy at least one more back, ok? *hugs*

Please don't be mad. We really didn't mean to lose it.

Your brother has been waking up every night around 3am, crying. I don't know is it because the bear is lost and he feels strange without it as a bedtime companion. I know you've taken good care of him and make sure he sleeps well and is a good boy. Thank you, Cedric. You've been a really good baby, and a really good elder brother to Joshua. And Mommy is very proud of you. :)

Please do not think that just because Daddy and I now have Joshua, we have forgotten you. We haven't, and we never will. There is a very big part of me that still wishes you were here with us. For us to love and adore physically, just as we do to Joshua.

There are times when I kiss Joshua's chubby little cheek that I wished it was yours. And that I could hold you in my arms and whisper to you how much I love you. And how you might smile back at me in reciprocation. I really wish for it. One day in heaven, I will do all that to you. Give you all the hugs I should have given to you, and tell you a million times and more how much I love you. And how I always will.

I will never forget you. Never.

Mommy will always love you. Always. Forever and ever even after I leave this world. Which then I will come to see you, up there in heaven, and see your cute little face for the first time.

Jamie dear, same for you. Be happy, be good, and mommy will be there with you very soon. After I'm done with everything on this earth. Mommy will be there to hold you, love you, and protect you. I will NEVER let any more harm come your way.

Be good, you two. Be good and wait for mommy to come to you. I miss you both very much.